Safaree's Interlude

*This is only Safaree I will zoom in on his life more without Nicki LOVE @TrebbleBarbie*

It had been going on 3 weeks since he seen or touched his wife and the day before thanks giving. Safaree was restless and miserable the whole 3 weeks. He had been calling Nicki none stop until she got her number changed; she actually went back to T-mobile because she knew he had access to the account to see the new number. He would call Martin everyday to try and speak but he would hear nicki in the back ground say little to nothing and Martin would tell him she didn’t want to speak. He technically counts this as not seeing his wife for 5 weeks because he only saw her for 1 hour 22 minutes and she was out the door after the argument.

Safaree’s days had been sad but his worst day was when Candi called him and told him that Monica was pregnant. Safaree cried in his mother’s house and even went crying to her. She just let him lay in her lap as he let out heart throbbing sobs of sadness, she was sad for him. Mrs. Samuels knew about the whole situation and she knew it wasn’t his fault. She even tried talking to nicki hinting on everything but nicki would just cut the conversation they were having short. Of course Nicki’s mother tried to talk to her, being that both of the mothers spoke to each other and knew of the split. But nicki still wouldn’t listen. At that moment nicki was living in her head, she would listen to music to blast out reality and the world awry.

Safaree started to lose weight from not eating. He would eat like a bird and not eat anymore. But he began to do pushups to blow off steam. When he would work out he would work out past the burn of his muscles. The lactic acid buildup in his arms was like a pain killer to his heart, it was numbing to the body. He worked out so hard one time he fainted, but that didn’t stop him from working out more. As he worked out he began to eat more. But the pain from working out didn’t match the pain that was running thru his veins. He was hurt because he hurt his wife, he didn’t even know if she was going to be his wife after she finds out about Monica’s baby.

Monica called Candi and told her a couple of days before that she was pregnant but she didn’t know whose baby it was. It was between safaree and her boyfriend and she was banking on safaree. The bitch was blood thirsty and she wanted him all to herself. She thought she beat nicki at something when really she was 10 steps behind. Nicki was 5 weeks pregnant and she didn’t know that. Monica asked Candi to give safaree her number so he could call her and she did. As soon as she got off the phone with her she called safaree and after that she called nicki. Candi gave her the whole run down about how it may not be his baby but nicki knew for sure it was so she was still pissed and even considered sending the papers to New York.

Safaree prayed every night and kept a smile on his face whenever he was around his family and now all of his family was coming in from Jamaica for the thanks giving celebration. They were really looking forward to seeing nicki but nicki had no intentions about being with him. Instead she flew her family to Florida to enjoy their feast.

Although he tried to hide his pain, his 2 sisters saw it the most. They could see right thru him and they knew he was depressed. Shanequa especially knew that he was holding back a lot just to look strong in appearance. When she came in that night she went to have a talk to safaree in his room.

“Come in” safaree said after he heard the knocking

“Hey bro”

“Hey baby sis”

“How have you been?”

“Making it I guess.”

“That’s what I wanted to talk to you about” Shanequa walked in and closed the door behind her. Safaree had been laying on the bed in just some grey sweats and socks, no tee shirt and no hat. Shanequa sat on the edge of the bed and leaned back on one arm to look over her shoulder at safaree in his face

“What’s up sis?”

“Have you talked to you wife?” safaree looked down at her and looked back up at the ceiling. She could tell he didn’t want to be reminded. He just shook his head no.

“Have you tried to call” she asked in a concerned tone

“Everyday sis”

“Safaree she’s going to forgive you. Even though you might have an addition to your family she is going to always love you. Love is unconditional and the love she had for you is unbearable.”

“She hates me”

“She’s saying that now. I mean if I was in her predicament I would be mad too that my husband went against his word. I’m sure she doesn’t give two shits about the bitch who practically raped you. She just mad you lied and did what you said you would do anymore and you have to pay the consequences of getting another bitch knocked up”

“See sis she will never forgive me because if this child is mine she won’t have my first born. My wife supposes to have my first born, not some bitch from the trap tryna tied me down with a baby so she can forever get my money.”

“Yeah but I’m sure she wouldn’t take it out on the baby. It’s not the baby’s fault but the two who made it. So yes she is mad at you but forgiveness will come. I’ve been praying on it too bro”

“I’ve been pleading on it what seems like forever, I just think she’s going to leave me. I’m done.im threw!” safaree sat up and scooted to the edge of the bed where his sister was and let his feet touch the ground in his white Hanes sock with the grey tips. He put his elbows to his knees and put his head in his hands and rubbed his face and head twice before looking at his sis in her eyes”

“God will work it out. And I don’t think that’s your baby. Aint no telling how many other dudes have fucked her. On that note have you gotten checked?”

“Yeah I did that when I got here; I made my appointment and got every test possible. I’m good she was clean but I was still prescribes with antibiotics just in case some other shit tried to sneak up on me”

“Ok good. And I’m guessing she is not coming up here for thanks giving?”

“Nope.”

Shanequa looked over at her brother who had his hands cross sitting in between his legs as his elbows rested on his thighs. He started to sniff a little and she knew he was going to cry. Safaree tried not to cry in front of his sisters for as long as he could remember. When his dad left them he promised he would be their rock, but today he was weak, his heart was weak, and his soul cried out for forgiveness from his wife.

“I know how love is safaree” she reached over and rubbed his left shoulder looking down at his platinum band that constantly reminded him why he still wanted to breathe. Safaree got up and put his crossed hands on his head and walked around the bed as he spoke to Shanequa not looking at her in her eyes. He was crying… ashamed

“Sis it’s like no matter how much I try, shit seems like its getting worst. My heart hates me; my mind tries to kill me. But I know if I kill myself nicki would hate me more. Sometimes I feel like God doesn’t hear my prayers. I prayed for daddy to comeback but he never did, I’m praying for my wife to come back but all I’m receiving is bad news… I can’t take this shit! Yeah I’m tough... but when it comes to nicki...” he looked down to the floor still crying and sucking up his tears. His nose ran his eyes were blood shot, and he looked like he hasn’t had sleep in decades. He looked horrible.

“Brother, never lose faith in God remember he was the one who gave her to you 11 years ago. He gave you life. Something’s that are happening are probably happening for a reason. God always has his reasons. He may never answer every prayer quick but best believe he will answer it when the time is right.”

“Thanks sis but, I call martin and I check up on her everyday”

“And what does he tell you?”

“He tells me that she is acting very hard and cold hearted. She cries herself to sleep. I feel so bad to be the cause of her heart ache when I promised I would be the last person or the person to never do that. I’ve failed her. Fuck it! I failed at life” his eyes were puffy but his tears were drying because he knew crying wasn’t going to get him anywhere.

“She’s being how you are. You two act exactly alike. You know that’s your wife when you two are separated and yall act completely the same. She isolates herself, cries, eats, sleeps from depression, cries some more and sleep. You isolate yourself and do the same except you don’t sleep and you work out instead of eat. But I will tell you this, me and her have been talking lately on Skype and I told her I would Skype her in a few. My lap top is down stairs” safaree flopped down on the bed and looked over to his sister

“You would do that for me sis. You are going to Skype her so I can see her?

“If you want me too”

“Of course I do”

“Ok hold on while I go get my Mac. Oh but there is one condition.”

“What?”’

“You can’t show your face or she won’t Skype.”

“Ok cool. I just want to see her Shanequa that’s all. I miss my wife, I want to hug her. I owe her so much. I just feel so dumb and stupid for the whole situation. My wife suppose to be carrying my child not this goofball” safaree looked away pissed off again. Their mother came towards the room.

“Is everything alright in here?” Mrs. Samuels asked looking at safaree fresh raw red face from crying

“Yes ma! Everything good. We just had a heart to heart”

“Awe ok, we’ll just to let yall know yall cousins will be here from Jamaica in a few like 6 hours from now”

“Ok ma!” safaree said. Mrs. Samuels walked out the room and headed back down stairs with Shanequa on her heels to go get her Mac book. She came back up stairs and plugged the charger into the wall and waited on the computer to boot. Safaree was all smiles now and you could see the life in him again for once in 3 weeks.

Inside safaree was nervous but excited to see his wife face. Safaree sat on the floor on the wall next to his full sized bed. Shanequa sat on the edge with one leg hanging off the bed so he could see the screen clear but nicki couldn’t see him. Shanequa saw she was on line and looked back at a smirking safaree.

“Ok I’m finna call her. Don’t say shit”

“Just call her dammit!”

“Alright! Alright already”

Shanequa pressed Video call on nickis profile. Nicki spoke as the video loaded, then the video popped on and safaree’s eyes lit up. Shanequa looked back at him and smiled.

“Hey nee nee” nicki said'

“Hey nicki nac”

“Hey how have you been this week?”

“I’ve been great chillen with the family. You know the family is flying up here!”

“Yes my mom told me.”

“Well how you been?” Shanequa asked concerned. Safaree looked at nicki without blinking. He paid attention to every aspect of her. He could tell she wasn’t doing well. She didn’t have on any makeup and under her eyes were dark from broken blood vessels in her bags from crying so much. Her cheeks were somewhat chubbier, her hair was in a messy bun, her lips were pink, and her nose was red from crying before. She had on a white beeda with no bra and some grey American eagle jogging pants. He just wanted to jump thru the screen and hold her and apologize for eternity, because he fucked up their ideal life style.

“I’ve been… I’ve been horrible nee nee. I sleep a lot because of depression. I don’t suppose to be depressed right now. And I’m eating a lot, just eating my life away. I talk to my barbs on twitter, and it usually cheers me up but that’s not working. My life without him is worthless but I can’t have a lying, cheating husband who has a child on the way by somebody else” safaree swallowed hard when he heard her say that out of her won mouth. He shifted in a different position how he was sitting but didn’t make too much noise.

“But you do understand it wasn’t his fault what happened. I mean... yes to some extent it was but not the baby and cheating. He didn’t mean to do that” nicki cried and pulled on her puffs plus lotion tissues that were on her bed and blew her nose.

“I know sis I’m just frustrated and mad. It’s best if we stayed apart.” Nicki looked down in her hands and fixed her tissues so she could dig in her nose. this frustrated safaree

“One day everything will come around”

“It will but it’s going to take me a while to get over the baby. What if it is his baby Shanequa? I don’t want him choosing me over the baby that not right. Every child deserves a father. I wouldn’t dare try to hurt an innocent child” Shanequa looked back and nodded her head at safaree saying I told you so with her face gestures

“You all will get thru it. That’s what will happen”

“Nee nee I can’t even talk to my best friends about this. So I’m grateful I have you here. It’s a surprise I gotta tell you but I will tell you later. I’m still trying to get over the fact that he won’t be here for our first Thanks giving dinner at our house. Ugh! I hate him but I love him. Fuck love! It’s always fuckin up people’s lives… sex too.” nicki giggle between sniffles and rolled her eyes at the last two comments she made

“It doesn’t have to be that way, call him and tell him to come home”

“Shit aint that easy nee nee. I need my space. If I see him I would fight him.”

“Okay I’m not pushing you but stop crying and stuff.  Go try and get some proper rest not tossing and turning.”

“Ok sis I will try.”

“My brother says he loves you and he says it every night to god. He’s been trying to call you”

“I know I changed my number.”

“Did you want me to relay a message or something?”

“Nope”

“Well okay I’m finna go help mama in the kitchen with all our curry chicken, jerk chicken, fresh white bread, rice and beans, corn, and so much more. Girl you missing out!” they laughed

“I know but…” nicki cut she short and just laid on the bed looking at the camera while they sat there silent waiting on nicki to finish her won sentence. Mrs. Carol called for her.

“Well I hear carol calling for you. You should go”

“Yeah sis I will call you next week, thanks for the therapy session again and relaying his message love you bye.” Nicki said waving

“Love you bye!”

Shanequa closed the Mac book and turned her body where she was facing her brother. Safaree sat there in a daze not blinking once. She could tell he was thinking, she could tell his heart was hurting, she could tell he wanted to be on the other side of that screen holding her… but he wasn’t. He asked himself in his head over and over again…

“Could this be life? This can’t be real; I’m living in a bad dream”

His mind and heart was racing at milliseconds. Shanequa got down on the floor and hugged him as he sat in that daze.

The next day was thanks giving and safaree was being occupied with his family. He tried not to think about nicki but he still called martin to see if she would speak but he was with his family and Jessie was with her family so it was no use to calling. He still enjoyed his family presence speaking in their native language. They danced sings, played games, caught up and exchanged pictures and made new memories with new picture. But it still wasn’t right because safaree was missing something, a big chunk of his heart, back at home… nowhere near him… but he kept smiling thru the questions and dinner.

*this is so emotionally draining! But I want yall to stick it out with me. As yall can see it’s a lil twist with this baby. So stay tuned and see what happens. and yes Safaree has a  soft spot and that Nicki, every man has one and every man hurt. Another interlude is next. LOVE @TrebbleBarbie*